My husband attempts to console. He tries to persuade me to go RIGHT then and buy something that fits. Surely that will make me feel better? Oh, men. Men. They just don't get it. Not only would going shopping in that state be a good reason for some nice store clerk to call the cops and have me committed, but he also doesn't understand that I DO NOT want to buy clothes in, gulp, the next size UP.
I cry. Yes, I sit there and cry because I'm hormonal and tired and feeling.....fat.
Funny how when daylight comes everything seems a little better. So, today I realize he is right. I need some pants that I can wear NOW that fit me. Whether they fit for two months or two years, he is right.
But, when I get to the store I have this tiny voice in the back of my mind saying "You haven't shopped in a while, maybe you're wrong about your size...." A faint flicker of hope builds inside me.
I hate that I am reduced to this.
But, *sigh* no. The size that fit me was the one I feared. I tried hard to act nonchalant with the tiny teenaged cashier who tried to chit chat when all I wanted to do was cry and take those dang pants home.
Have I mentioned that I hate that I am reduced to this?
But I didn't cry. Nope. I went home and got on my machine. And when my husband peeked in the room and said "You're STILL on the machine?" I answered with what will now be my new LIFE STATEMENT. Are you ready for it?
"You know what works better than crying? Sweating."
Please, someone, tell me I'm not alone in this. Am I crazy? Has this happened to you?
Linked up with: Working Kansas Homemaker
Raising Arrows
hey girl, i too have felt like this... i have a pair of ugly black stretchy-tent like pants that i bought once because I had nothing to wear on thanksgiving. i was hoping they would look hippy-chick... but they just look like a big black tent. it'll get better.
ReplyDeletelorri
Thanks girl. And you look awesome.
DeleteNope. You're not alone. Not alone at all. I'm happy beyond all reason that long shirts and higher-waisted pants are back in style. Once you've birthed a baby, low-rise jeans are no longer your friends.
ReplyDeleteYou are SO right. Just know when you see me tomorrow at church I will be wearing pants that made me want to slap a teenage cashier.
DeleteNote to self: sit on the other side of the class. ;)
DeleteHA! Good plan.
DeleteI am 8 weeks post third baby. Pants fit somewhat, it is the shirts that don't, not because of big chest like with the other two, but because of muffin-top, love-handles. I've had many mornings of multiple tops and yes on the verge of tears mist every time we're going ou.
ReplyDeleteGive it time, it will come. 8 weeks out I remember having the same problem - it's amazing how your body snaps back!
DeleteAmy! I know we haven't talked in like...10 years but I always read your blogs and I love it! I honestly went through this the other day exact same situation, seriously like throwing away all my clothes, crying lol my boyfriend was scared I think. This entry made me laugh though (not at you at how similar it was to my "episode" lol) I think you look fabulous from what I see in pictures! You are so beautiful :) -Danielle tuck
ReplyDeleteOh you are so funny. I'm pretty sure this happens to all women, we just don't share it with each other. And YOU, my dear, are beautiful!!!
Deleteyour aunt sandy told me many years ago that her new post weight gain policy was to buy a bigger pair and then tear off the size tag.i thought that was a good idea, ha ha
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mother, but I refuse to GIVE IN TO THIS!!!!!!! I'm pretty sure Cammie told me that once too, she must have heard it from her mother....
DeleteI am SOOOO with you right now! I HATE muffin top...and the only thing keeping me from buying new pants is that we don't have the money to spare right now...that and, once it gets a little warmer, I can wear my capris, and I KNOW some of those will fit better!
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, I'm wearing tops that are flow-y and cover my gut while I work on better eating and exercising (thanking you again for the book...I read the first chapter yesterday and it inspired a family discussion about all of us eating better. Tomorrow, I'm lacing up the running shoes and plan on getting back into running, not just walking)
We can beat this together! And cry together, sometimes, too!
I'm thinking from all the hits this post got that ALOT of us deal with this issue! So glad that the book arrived safely and you are enjoying it. It makes me happy it sparked discussion, it really did make me think through alot of things. You can do this, I can do this, WE CAN!
DeleteWe all feel like this. Sad part is, when I close my eyes and picture myself, I still see the me I was in 1983 - size 6. HA! Since then I have gained 2 more of me. As I see it, buying bigger clothes is better than people seeing this fat, lumpy, rolly, body without any! (Notice how I laugh at my situation. I have to laugh or I will cry without ceasing . . .)
ReplyDeleteAw Amy this has SO happened to me! I think that motto will change things though! Thank you for linking up and sharing your heart (and your tantrum! ;))
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Nicole at Working Kansas Homemaker
it's ok...I'm loosing hair and it pain me tremendously. When I look at all the old photos, with my shoulder length hair and grungy look...I cried too.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry. I am so with you. I feel so fat in everything so i just wear the same outfits every week.
ReplyDeleteOH GIRL, I have been there. The closet tantrums happen. I recently bought a pair of jeans a size up and almost cried in the dressing room. I have to remind myself that yes, I need to take care of my body and yes, I need to make healthy choices. But God's going to use me no matter what the number on my clothes says. Hang in there, friend!
ReplyDelete