Monday, January 13, 2014

Letting Go

I was lounging in bed reading a book, it was about 3 in the afternoon and we just really needed some "quiet time" as we like to call it.  My 8 year old daughter comes in my room, dressed "cool" with a hat, jeans,
and t-shirt that's certainly not pink and I would never have picked for her, with her barbie in hand to show me the new haircut her "friend" had just received.


I am completely blown away in that moment by the phase she is in.  She has reached an age where she no longer wants to look "cute" but "cool", but she LOVES her Barbies, Squinkies, and Polly Pockets.  I want this age to last forever, I dread the day when she looks at her Barbies and can't remember why she ever wanted to play with them.

My son goes across the street by himself to play with the neighbor kids.  Sometimes both of them do and I'm left alone at home wondering when my kids got old enough to run around in the neighborhood without me having a total panic attack.

Letting go is really hard for me.  Some people are naturally more relaxed and laid back, but I was raised with an ER-nurse-mother and I've watched entirely too much crime television.

BUT, I know that to let my kids turn into the adults God wants them to one day become, I have to let go - let them learn their own lessons - let them get in arguments with friends and learn to work it out themselves - get their feelings hurt sometimes. 

It's just one more thing that God is teaching me about releasing my control.  It was an illusion that I was ever in control anyway, it's so much more peaceful if I just lay down my weapons and surrender to the fact that HE is the one in charge.  But I have to pray about it daily.  Hourly.  Sometimes minutely.

Is it hard for you to let go?  What is your area that gives you the most heartache?


2 comments:

  1. you are wise to realize your part to play in raising your children...prepare them for adulthood when they will be living idependent of you. i remember when it was pointed out to me...in a book i read or conversation...don't remember how now, but i do remember how it affected my attitude toward the remaining time they were with us. i didn't have to get involved in every power struggle...or get into power struggles over unimportant issues. i needed to help them learn to take responsibility for their own behavior and its consequences. it's not necessarily an easier process, it is a healthier one for all concerned. involves a lot more asking questions and less edicts. personally, i found it better for developing a relationship with my kids that went to adulthood. hand in there.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Martha! It is so hard sometimes though....I hate to see my son cry and he gets his feelings hurt so easily!

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